Phew!!! I am sitting in my Pudsey garden in 78 degrees of balmy heat just shaking my head in wonder at the great darts fest we had at Bolton.
Keeping tabs on 170 plus darters was difficult and doing 26 hours of live telly was invigorating but it was hour by hour a pure gas.
Looking through my tatty water-spotted notes, here’s what jumps out off the pages…
Colin Osborne, slim as a rake, ex yo-yo champion and international table tennis star, taking big scalps. His lady wife was tearing her hair as Col just failed against the lightning fast Vincent Van der Voort.
Phil the Power smacked in a cool nine-darter and sent Rod Harrington screaming like Sidney in banshee mode on the commentary. Sensationelle!
Then boxer Amir Khan showed up to support Phil. Phil’s heart rate DROPPED from around 124 to 118 when he threw against Barney – he must have pure ice in those veins. My monitor went up to 131 just as I was being interviewed by Dave Clark for Sky Sports News. Mind, I probably go over 160 at peak times on commentary when the fun kicks off.
Four of the cast of Coronation Street showed up for a few jars and a laugh only to be UPSTAGED completely by John Gwynne who reeled off stories on telly about teaching one of them at grammar school. John is a frustrated thespian if ever I saw one.
Best crowd placard was definitely VANTASTIC as the two Dutch lads went off in the brilliant final. I wish I had said it first.
The secret to Barney’s brilliant form was told to me by his excitable manager, Ed de Veer. ‘Raymond must relax and enjoy his darts. Against Taylor he must not expect to lose.’ And the rest is history. Once Ray got to 8-4 in his quarter final against a tired looking Phil, he began to have fun and produce genius darts. He took out Lloyd fairly easily and then did a complete cool conquering number on Van der Voort in the final. Also, his use of the Taylor stacking method of attack on the 60 bed is now superior to the maestro’s.
So now the theme for the next six months to Ally Pally is set. Can van Gerwen get consistency into his flashy genius? Can James Wade and Adrian Lewis add self belief to their electric talent?
Believe Sidney, we darts fanatics have never had it so good.
BELLIES AND BULLSEYES IN STORES
I have just heard that cardboard cut-outs of The Geordie Lip will soon be appearing in branches of WH Smiths and Borders bookshops. It’s all to publicise my book Bellies and Bullseyes, which has taken the book trade by storm. You can take part in competitions that could win you a day at the darts with Sid! Maybe you could get to carry my backpack containing my make-up and throat sweets…